As I sat down to study this morning a tugging at my heart led me to open my bible. With boards looming over my head, and anxiety starting to take over I knew I needed to study – but I reluctantly opened God’s Word and started reading where I left off yesterday.
Mark 3 & 4. I planned to read more but I got stopped in the middle.
I know I am not a world class writer, nor do I have insights that will blow your mind. I am a mustard seed.
“What shall we say the kingdom of God is like, or what parable shall we use to describe it? It is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest of all seeds on earth. Yet when planted, it grows and becomes the largest of all garden plants, with such big branches that the birds can perch in its shade.” Mark 4:30-32
It was at this point I was stuck. As I sat, nothing more than a tiny little dot in the scheme of the world – the Grand Tetons surrounding me I was reminded how small I truly am. (Trust me as I tried to hike up the mountain earlier in the morning I didn’t make it more than 10 minutes before I couldn’t breathe…I looked up and realized I didn’t make it even 1/4 of the mountain. Yup, i’m minuscule).
Yet, my Father loves me more than I could ever comprehend.
When I first started reading my bible (and I mean really reading it, not just skimming), I would get so confused by all the parables and I would think ‘what the heck is he talking about?’ I took the role of his own family in thinking – this man was out of his mind. (Mark 3:21) And let me tell you, this is completely normal. We are not all meant to have extravagant philosophical thoughts, to attend seminary school, and to preach. But we all have our place in this world. And wherever you are (and however crazy you think Jesus was), he’s waiting for you. Arms wide open.
Maybe you’re the seed that fell on the path or in the thorns… Before you’re able to truly understand what is ahead of you the birds come and eat your faith up. (Mark 4:4). Maybe that bird is a church that shunned you, a christian that did you wrong, or your own doubts and fears.
Maybe you’re the seed in the rocky place… You’re stuck in the treacherous terrain (like how I felt trying to hike up the mountain). You think you’ll never get out. You feel as if you have came so far but when you look up you see how much farther you have to go and you give up. (Mark 4:5).
Maybe you’re the seed that fell in the good soil… You are deep in your journey with the Lord and you are able to grow in your faith with ease. You have the Water of Life following through you and nothing can hold you back. I commend you – this is where I hope to be.
But maybe you related to multiple places? Your seed has fallen in different terrains.
Thats normal. No matter where you are. YOU ARE LOVED.
YOU ARE HIS BELOVED.
But yet you are a mustard seed. The smallest seed on earth. The world has a funny way of making us feel that way. Small. Inadequate. Worthless. Broken. Guilty. Unlovable. Like you’ll never make a difference. You’re to small to survive in this world.
But the Lord said, “Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.” (Mark 4:9)
The Lord chooses the people who the world deems as incapable. Moses had a stutter, David was the smallest of the army, Daniel had no strength compared to the lions, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego had no defense, Mary was a young unmarried woman, and so on and so forth. I am one of these people. You are one of these people.
But as Mark goes on to state – that in public Jesus spoke in parables. But “when he was alone with his own disciples, he explained everything.” You are a disciple. And you are his beloved.
Draw near to him, his arms are open. You are so much more than a dot on this world. You are a mustard seed, and you will grow, stronger than you could have ever imagined.